Today I had more children than usual. Three of my own and one borrowed. A day with four kids turned out to be one of the nicest days we have had in a long time.
An extra pair of hands arrived at the door
We have lived here four months now, and from almost the very beginning, our neighbours’ nine-year-old daughter has been part of our daily life. She plays with Ms, who is four. She looks after Mr, who is two and has Down syndrome, in that gentle and instinctive way that some children just have. She cuddles B, who is two months old, every chance she gets. She is simply one of those children who slots into a household and makes it work better.
Her mother called yesterday evening. Both parents work through the day and she asked, very simply, whether their daughter could come and spend the day with us. She knows there is always a proper hot meal on the table here, that there are rules, that the children are looked after. I said yes immediately. Of course I did. Because a day with four kids that includes a capable, kind nine-year-old is, in practical terms, considerably easier than a day with three.
She arrived early, while we were already up. Only Ms was still asleep.
Morning: breakfast, laundry, and nursing in between everything
My partner left for work. I made Mr his breakfast, then Ms woke up and I made breakfast for her and the neighbour’s daughter too. In between I nursed B and did a load of washing and hung it out. The morning moved the way mornings do when there are children in them – constantly, in all directions, with small interruptions every few minutes – but it moved smoothly.
I got to cuddle everyone briefly before we headed outside, which felt like a small luxury.
A day with four kids and a fifteen-minute walk to the sea
On a normal outing it is me with Ms on her bicycle, pushing Mr’s balance bike and pulling B’s pram behind me – two hands not quite being enough. Today the neighbour’s daughter pushed Mr’s bike and I had both hands free for B’s pram. Ms rode ahead on her bicycle. We went in a little line down the road – four children and one mother, single file along the edge where the traffic is light and mostly familiar faces who slow down without being asked.
We walked fifteen minutes to the harbour. There is no proper swimming beach there – just a slipway where boats are launched, sloped and a little slippery, but manageable if you approach it from the dry flat ground beside it. The real swimming spots are not reachable on foot, but on warm days the sea is the sea and we want to be near it.
I left B a little distance back on the flat ground in his pram. He is a calm baby – I knew he would be fine for a few minutes. I had been practical about clothing: I asked Ms to take her trousers off before we left so she was already in just her underwear, ready for water. Mr I undressed from trousers and nappy entirely – it is a quiet, private spot with almost no one around except the occasional local whose boat sits in the water there.
Ms and the neighbour’s daughter played in the water with their crocs, filling them and splashing each other. I sat a metre away with Mr between my legs and we dangled our feet in together. The stones massaged my feet and the seawater was cool and the sun was on our faces. Mr splashed and looked at his feet with great concentration. I cannot fully describe how good that half hour felt.
We did not stay long – lunchtime was approaching. Mr got a dry nappy and trousers. Ms put on dry underwear and her trousers. We walked home in our little line.
The one sour note
Ms was in a difficult mood on the way back. Arguing, moaning, making the last stretch harder than it needed to be. Her character can be genuinely challenging – she is strong-willed and persistent and not inclined to let things go. My partner says she is exactly like me in this. Perhaps he is right.
Afternoon: naps, salad, and a quiet stretch
For lunch we had soup that mamma had made and my partner brought over yesterday. The girls went outside after eating and I took the boys to the bedroom. Mr fell asleep quickly. I spent that time with B, then tidied and washed myself while they both slept.
When the girls came back in and Mr woke up, my partner arrived home from his first job and took Mr straight to papa and mamma’s place. I made a salad and heated up last night’s dinner. The girls and I ate together. I washed up. Then the girls drew while I bathed B – a calm, warm, unhurried bath, just the two of us.
The girls went back outside. I stayed with B. Ms came in occasionally to ask for a snack, which I gave her – they had all eaten properly today and deserved it. In an hour I will offer yoghurt or something light before the neighbours come back from work to collect their daughter. Then my partner and Mr will come home and the evening will settle into its usual shape.
What a day with four kids actually feels like
Being a mother to many is a real blessing. That is not a polished thing to say – it is just true. The blessing comes wrapped in chaos and power struggles and tears and noise and the constant pull of someone needing something. But it also comes with laughter and cooperation and the particular joy of watching children figure out how to be with each other.
Today was a good day. A genuinely good day with four kids, the sea, mamma’s soup, crayon drawings, and a baby who slept in his pram at the harbour while his siblings splashed in the water beside him.
We are already looking forward to having the neighbour’s daughter back.
You are not alone.
If this story resonated with you and you’d like to go deeper, you can explore my e-book Our Journey – A Different Path. It offers honest reflections and lived experience beyond this post.
If you’re looking for practical support, I’ve created Routine Templates to help parents and children navigate daily life with more clarity, structure, and understanding.
You can also read my previous posts or follow along on Instagram @parentguidancehub, where I share everyday reflections on parenting, family life, and finding balance.
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